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Bedbugs, Brain Collapse, & Birthdays
Long time, no type.
Mainly, I’ve been riding the wave of gleeful post-homework life and spending very little computer time doing anything that requires significant cognitive processing. Not to mention that the last few weeks at work have been tremendously busy, and insanely stressful what with top-down administrative reorganizations, severe budget cuts, and the like. So needless to say, I haven’t been in much of a bloggy frame of mind.
However, I feel the need to issue a report on our grand vacation in early June; a whirlwind trip that started with my #1 niece’s high school graduation and ended with a crazy 5-day stint in…..you guessed it…..Las Vegas. The Vegas leg of the trip was a long-awaited family celebratory extravaganza to ring in a host of decade-centric birthdays (ahem, yes, I wasn’t the only one with a milestone this year.) One of my nephews, my brother, and my dear hubby all hit “decade” birthdays between mid April and mid June. So naturally we all felt the need to hoop it up in sin city.
But before I get ahead of myself too far, let me reel back a bit and describe the first segment of the trip. My dear eldest niece, so lovely in body and spirit, was graduating with honors from a tremendously rigorous International Baccalaureate-affiliated school the first weekend of June. I was very excited to attend, particularly to hear her speak at the graduation ceremony. However, seeing as said ceremony was scheduled to begin quite early in the morning, at roughly a 2-hour drive from our house, we opted to drive up the Friday before and meet up with GMom to share a hotel room.
Considering that we also had to plan ahead/pack for the Vegas trip, get the pets settled, load the car, feed the kid, and a million other things after an already-long day of work, we didn’t get out of town until almost 8pm, which put our arrival into a rather late-ish timeframe. After unloading our overnight gear and securing a late night snack courtesy of the only open business in the area — Circle K — I started prepping the little genius for bed. I left her in the hotel bathroom to marinate in the shower for a few moments while I went to unpack her jammies and get the bed ready. Upon reaching for a pillow, what did I see but a tiny little bug on the pillow!
Now, not that I travel all that much, but you’d have to live in a deep cave anymore these days not to be aware of ye olde modern hotel bedbug epidemic. Being a bonafide bug-o-phobe already, of course my mind leapt to the possibility of bedbugs, although the little specimen was very tiny. I asked FF and Uncle Bubba (also sharing the room) to give it an eyeball, and in the course of examining that and other pillows, they located a much larger and more suspicious looking critter, which we caught in a plastic cup. At that point, with frantic smartphone image Googling underway, we felt rather alarmed and certain that we hit the unlucky jackpot of a bedbug-infested room.
And honestly, the front desk wasn’t all that much help…they offered to move us to a different room, but that wasn’t very reassuring considering that all of us had horrific images of bringing home our very own bedbug buddies to our respective domiciles, never to be pest-free again. This was particularly unsettling to FF and I, considering that a few years ago we suffered through an epic, almost yearlong flea war at our old crappy apartment. And believe me, we tried everything, to no avail. Moving out WAS the final solution. So needless to say, we are pretty particularly picky when it comes to bug issues.
So our troops did a quick huddle and we decided to relocate to another hotel (by this time nearly 1am), yet unfortunately the only affordable place reasonably nearby was a 30 minute drive away. Ugh. However, despite our collective exhaustion, this seemed a better option than potentially offering ourselves up as blood donors to the native fauna. The little genius was taking everything in stride pretty well, despite some confusion and tiredness. We repacked our overnight gear and shuffled back down to the van. Unfortunately however, during the baggage and kid-loading insanity, we managed to lock a) the kid b) all our stuff and c) the keys, snugly in the van.
Oh shit.
So yes, friends and neighbors, we stood outside a bedbug-ridden hotel in a sleepy small hamlet at 1am shouting instructions through a closed window to our frantically crying daughter on how to escape her snug, safe, 5-point carseat harness with the child-resistant latch so that she could unlock the van for us. Totally not one of my proudest moments. Fortunately the little genius is a trooper and she calmed down and persevered enough to get us out of the fiasco. After that, we hit the highway and about an hour later we all collapsed into an exhausted slumber.
So the management did call and talk to Gmom the next day (she had made the reservation) and were properly apologetic and all that crap, issuing refunds and free night coupons ad nauseam. And a few days after that, they emailed a copy of their pest company report, predictably denying any bedbug issues but admitting the presence of some “carpet beetles”. Well, I appreciate them sharing the report and all but I gotta say that I’m still not convinced and I don’t think they actually examined the critter we captured and showed to the front desk staff.
SO, needless to say the next morning came very early and as for my little family pod, we reluctantly decided to skip the main ceremony and let the little genius continue to get some much-needed rest. We did attend the post-ceremony graduation party and it was a lot of fun, particularly when my niece “unwrapped” a very exciting present: a car! K thought that was just about the coolest and most exciting thing she’d ever heard of, and I’m pretty sure she will not forget it, and thus expectantly hold it over her parents’ heads until her own high school graduation. Sigh.
So with that dramatic report out of the way, I’m happy to say that the Vegas phase of the trip was tons of fun and very smooth sailing with no buggy or incompetent parenting episodes. We bowled, we saw movies, we gambled, we swam, we played a lot of cards in the sumptuous top-floor suite that K2 & family occupied, and generally a great time was had by all. The young guys (uncle bubba, my #1 nephew and #2 nephew) camped out in the 2nd suite bedroom and turned it into an X-box blazin’, Dr. Pepper guzzling, stinky man cave. They loved it.
The guys went to see Cirque’s new Elvis show one night, and the next night the girls went to see Menopause: The Musical. Which was, um, quite an experience and has given me a slightly worried perspective on my future hormonal event horizon. (Is it too early to already be experiencing the whole brain collapse thing? ’cause lately….) Seriously though, the show was quite a laugh and a lot of fun to see with Gmom and Aunt D (K2′s mom).
Speaking of Gmom, she brought some serious magic to the table and managed to somehow make an amazingly elaborate cake in a hotel mini-kitchen for us birthday folks! Totally awesome. (and delicious!)
All in all, a trip (and birthday) to remember!
Back again!
We’ve got to stop meeting like this…people are going to start wondering! Holy month-plus blogging hiatus! Ideally, I’d begin this post explaining how refreshed and relaxed I am, but meh, it wouldn’t exactly be the truth, so what the hell – I won’t waste your time.
Anyhoo, after my last confessional missive, I began a fabulous! sensational! post entitled “Essay on Marriage” to commemorate my upcoming 7th anniversary, but the writing proved more complex than I originally anticipated (how deliciously ironic!). So I had to put it on ice while we went on a whirlwind 2-week vacation. I’m sure I’ll be thawing it out of the draft locker soon.
Said vacation was a nice, if not entirely original, break. First, we did a 5 day stint in Vegas…after all, it is tradition on our anniversary. We ate some good food, drank some good stuff, did a little shopping, caught a couple movies (I really liked Karate Kid!), bummed around the pool, and generally had a good time. This time we did try something new though…we took K bowling, and it was surprisingly more fun than I expected. I’m sure it’ll become a regular Vegas agenda item now that she knows how much fun it is, and that there is a 24-hour bowling alley inside the hotel/casino where we usually stay.
From Vegas, we then spent a night in Kingman at the fairy-dust Hampton Inn, luxuriating in their ultra-comfortable environment. And the next day…a good ol’ Route 66 adventure! We ambled along to Peach Springs and did the Grand Canyon Caverns tour, which was very interesting, but not something I will probably feel compelled to repeat. I’m not really claustrophobic about caves…but there is still something just a little overwhelming about being in a rocky void 200 feet underground. After a post-caving dinner stop in wacky Seligman, we were on our way into lovely northern AZ to spend a few days with Gmom and Uncle Bubba, including a delightful July 4th steak-and-s’mores experience.
Going against the norm, I actually took a wee break from my various electronic leashes this time too, although I did not maintain complete abstinence. I left my work phone at home, and only briefly glanced at work email ONE TIME in that 2-week period. It was rather blissful to leave it all behind for a while. I did bring my netbook of course, but barely used it, except to slip in a couple of episodes of LOST here and there.
After returning home, we faced a marathon of mundane unpacking, laundry, and pre-surgery appointments for FF. The hell season is in full swing, with temps running in the 110-115° range most days. I am so cringing in advance for our August electricity bill. The heat and residual vacation lethargy kept me from bothering with anything that remotely required intellectual focus (ie blogging, responding to email, paying bills etc) and so all my spare moments have been filled with an odd assortment of summer shows on DVR, and reading a few books FF picked up for me at the library. This summer has had a distinctly supernatural flavor, with lots of vampires, pixies, demons and the like. I breezed through Terry Goodkind’s “Law of Nines” on vacation because I have been pining for a new Richard/Kahlan book, but unfortunately this book fell quite flat in my opinion…very one-dimensional and forgettable compared to his other works. Sigh.
Anyway, FF survived his wee eye surgery last week to straighten out his lazy eye. He apparently had a significant amount of scar tissue from prior childhood surgeries, and so he came out of surgery looking drastically, demonically bloodshot. At 2 weeks post-surgery, the redness is just now starting to clear a bit, poor guy. But in true FF fashion, he is quite stoic and takes it all in stride. He is looking forward to improved depth perception and peripheral vision once his brain sorts out the new visual field. I am looking forward to him being ready to drive again, because while I dearly love my daughter, I am getting tired of being the sole parent on transportation detail. Yeah, I know that sounds pretty self-centered and all, but… Kids are so lovable, but SO horrifying, too. Anyone who says otherwise is on much stronger drugs than I am.
And with that poignant thought, I will wrap this up, with other updates to follow soon. Ciao!
Stuff I Took for Granted…
…before becoming a parent:
- Sleep. Yeah this is The Big One, but until you have a kid, the reality of YEARS of screwed up sleep doesn’t really hit home. It is every bit as bad as advertised, and more. I’m pretty much convinced that even when she sleeps well through the night, every night, and goes to bed by herself, etc, my own sleep systems will probably never recover from the trauma.
- Sub-sleep topic: weekend afternoon naps with your spouse. Sigh.
- Privacy. For example, you get so used to having short people follow you into the bathroom all the time that after awhile, you just give up trying. You don’t even think about closing the door anymore, even if your kid is out of the house with grandma or whatever.
- Spontaneous late night pancake runs. Even if you don’t mind taking your kid out late and messing with their schedule, it comes to a point where getting them ready to go, strapping in and out of the carseat, etc makes it more hassle than it’s worth.
- Going to see movies. I miss being able to just decide to see an interesting movie and go whenever. Nothing says escapism like a dark theater and 100 oz. of buttery popcorn.
- Doing virtually any task without interruption at least every 2 minutes. This is especially difficult in regards to doing homework. My train of thought gets wrecked. This is one reason why I am frequently doing homework at 4am.
- Reading lots of books that didn’t sound as if they were written by drunken monkeys. Now, being a voracious reader, I still fit in a little bit of non-educational, non-kid reading but it is few and far between. Seriously, kid books are like a racket for people that couldn’t write real books. As long as they can find a good artist illustrator, they can peddle the weirdest, strangest stuff on kids.
- Casually throwing a handful of stuff in a backpack and going somewhere for the weekend. It is an absolute law of physics that there is an inverse relationship between the age of a person and the sheer amount of crap that has to be packed for traveling. It is truly shocking at times, when you find your car 90% full of stuff, and 9 out of 10 items belong to your child. And god help you if you forget something. You WILL be purchasing a reasonable fascimile at your destination–forget about winging it until you get home.
- Shopping Efficiently. I hate shopping for the most part–grocery, clothes, whatever but it takes on a whole new dimension of irritation with babies/kids. No more running in, achieving objective, and running out. Now it’s all about loading, unloading, wild animal containment, conversation, etc.
- Unfearfulness. Yeah I don’t think that’s a word, but even though as an adult there are things that worry or scare you, it’s nothing like being up at 3am with a wheezing baby, or the psychological damage you may be inflicting by incompetent parenting.
I’m pretty sure given enough time to dwell on this, I’d have a bunch more to add to this list, and I’m sure FF probably has his own list. But the honest truth is that it’s all worth it–I wouldn’t trade K for anything. She’s an amazing, loving, wonderful person and fills my life with joy (and interruptions).





